a time to rebuild

Well, the day has finally arrived.... we are going home. There's been so much to do that I've not really processed that as of this evening, I will be back in my own home... with my hubby and our son. I am excited, but I think I'm more relieved than anything to finally have this portion of Ethan's journey behind us. There was so much we didn't know 5 months ago when he was first diagnosed with leukemia. There was so much we didn't know 7 weeks ago when we came to Boston for his cord blood (aka: bone marrow) transplant. And truth be told, there is so much we don't know about our immediate future. But one thing I do know... and I know it with all of my heart... God knows. He knew 5 months ago when I took Ethan to the doctor thinking he had a cold. He knew later that night when they told us it was leukemia. He knew who would be the best match for Ethan's transplant, even if it wasn't the best factual match (he received a 4 out of 6 match, which isn't great, but was the closest they could find for him). He knew how long Ethan and I would have to stay in Boston. He knew that His protection would be with our son every step of the way. And.... what brings tears to my eyes the most.... He knows. He knows the desires of my heart. He knows the plans He has for me. He knows the plans He has for Adam. He knows the plans He has for Ethan. And they are fully of goodness and mercy. I don't know that I've ever seen the Hand of God work so distinctly as I have with my son. And I reckon that the magnitude of everything He has done has yet to fully sink into my comprehension. I know that the next several weeks, months leading up to this next year of our lives may not be easy... but I also know that day by day it will get easier... and before we know it... life will be more than we could have ever imagined. How do I know? Because I know my Lord. And I know He loves me.

Jesus loves me, this I know.... for the Bible tells me so.

Little ones to Him belong, they are weak but He is strong.

Yes, Jesus loves me

Yes, Jesus loves me

Yes, Jesus loves me

The Bible tells me so.

I leave you with a few prayer requests if you don't mind? Adam and I will be bringing Ethan back to Boston on Monday for his first outpatient visit.

• Please be in prayer that his dependency on blood and platelet transfusions will decrease and that if they are necessary, that we will be able to handle that portion of his care at our home hospital.
• Please also pray that Ethan remains fever-free. He has two teeth on the bottom that are going to poke through ANY MINUTE, and I understand that babies get teething fevers sometimes. However, ANY fever means an automatic hospital re-admission for at least 48 hours. They've taken good care of Ethan here in Boston, but I do not want to have to come back and be re-admitted!
• Please also pray that all goes well with his medications I have to give him at home. He will have to take about 5 or 6 medicines by mouth, several times a day AND I will have to give him a shot in his leg daily until his counts get a little higher. I'm not nervous about any of it, I just want him to respond well to everything and not throw up, etc.
• And of course, we want him to remain free of infection/sickness as his immune system takes its time to rebuild itself. By the way, his counts are 1,820 today.

Thank you for your prayers.... I'm sure we will need them as we get re-adjusted to home life all over again. Oh yeah, one last thing... I read this in my devotion this morning, from Streams in the Desert, and thought it fitting to share with you as well.

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"My Father is the husbandman" (John 15:1)

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"It is comforting to think of trouble, in whatever form it may come to, us, as a heavenly messenger, bringing us something from God. In its earthly aspect it may seem hurtful, even destructive; but in its spiritual out-working it yields blessing. Many of the richest blessings which have come down to us from the past are the fruit of sorrow or pain. We should never forget that redemption, the world's greatest blessing, is the fruit of the world's greatest sorrow. In every time of sharp pruning, when the knife is deep and the pain is sore, it is an unspeakable comfort to read, "My Father is the husbandman."

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Doctor Vincent tells of being in a great hothouse where luscious clusters of grapes were hanging on every side. The owner said, "When my new gardener came, he said he would have nothing to do with these vines unless he could cut them clean down to the stalk; and he did, and we had no grapes for two years, but this is the result." There is rich suggestiveness in this interpretation of the pruning process, as we apply it to the Christian life. Pruning seems to be destroying the vine, the gardener appears to be cutting it all away; but he looks on into the future and knows that the final outcome will be the enrichment of its life and greater abundance of fruit. There are blessings we can never have unless we are ready to pay the price of pain. There is no way to reach them save through suffering. - Dr. Miller.

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"I walked a mile with Pleasure,

She chattered all the way;

But left me none the wiser

For all she had to say.

I walked a mile with Sorrow,

And ne'er a word said she;

But, oh, the things I learned from her

When sorrow walked with me."